Thursday, July 15, 2010

The Tiniest Violin In the World

Is playing the saddest song in the world for Paul. When he could have been hired by a manager, she was giving him pills instead of employment. Now, he is trying to find a way out of his addiction. He cannot afford a doctor.
He wants my support in this. Which I am fine with considering I have been supporting him in helping him find employment. I got another computer so he can be online and look for work. I bought him clothes so he can go to an interview. I even grabbed him another application, one that he lied about filling out. More support...
The major problem I have is that he is turning this into my problem. I start telling him something, he says that I am yelling at him. No, I am not. I tell him to stop doing something. He says that I am yelling at him. No, I'm not yelling until the third time the same thing happens again. He still does it. He starts reading things and going through things that are none of his business. He bothers me at a stressful job telling me that I am cheating and he is upset with me.
Things keep getting re-arranged by him. I have no clue where anything is anymore. He even changed items around in my totes. Now, I really don't know where anything is. He does things without me such as moving my room. There is no "together" with him. I keep telling him to stop. He does not.
He told me that it is my fault that he is taking medication. Paul told me that he does not know how to cope with me. I told him he needs to stop moving things around and leave me be to do my school work. It's not my fault. Just because I have to repeat myself like a broken record does not mean someone else needs to take drugs just to cope with me. Just because someone else instigates a fight with me does not mean they have to do drugs.
Telling me it is my fault that you are doing drugs will land you in the doghouse. Telling me it is my fault does not resolve the issue. It only makes me look like a scapegoat. Telling me something is my fault is the same thing as saying my parents divorce was my fault. It is the same thing as saying that I cause people to become an alcoholic.
I am sorry for such a crappy blog. I had to get it off my chest because I am pissed. I am tempted to call the head office of Taco Bell and ask them if it is customary to hire such scum bags and permit for bad work ethic to take place. I am upset with Paul and I believe that I will be mad at him for a long time.

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