Pain Pain Go Away

I was actually convinced that he missed me. He has not told me that he is not coming back to Idaho. He didn't even say good-bye to me either. I really liked Josh. all I can say is fuck this shit. I'm going to be single for the rest of my life, fuck you men.
Not to mention that I am so sick of being here. I'm sick of the nieghbors. I'm sick of the cats. I'm sick of the people across the street. I'm sick of commuting. I'm sick of being far away from everything.

A little too much excitement

So, I watched some clips from the Oprah show in Australia. Hugh Jackman, the modern day god, zipped down down a zip line and nearly cracked his head open. I thought about that one actress that died after she got a concussion. Can you imagine what would happen if Hugh died from a head injury? How would Oprah feel? Then after that, I wonder if Australia would go to war with America because Oprah killed Mr. Jackman.
Speaking of droolalicious men. Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett split. I like them both; both beautiful. He has good taste in women...who have a twin brother. Alanis and Scarlett each have a twin brother. I don't have a twin brother, I don't think I have a chance with Ryan. ;)
I hung out with Leslie the other day. She is a former room mate, the best room mate ever. Who here is aware of Paul accusing me of cheating on him? He has been sending me dirty text messages. When he was with me, he used to try to get with Leslie. I told him that he is a piece of shit. I haven't heard much from him. He quit after I told him again what a cheat he is when he was griping about Bree.
Josh is in Arkansas...I wish he was here. He does need to spend time with his family. I just wish I had the luxury of leaving if I wanted. He says that he misses me. I don't believe I missed anyone so badly. I hope he returns. He was telling me that his brother wants him to move there. I don't think he is excited about that idea and I do not believe he is thrilled about living in Idaho either.
I had an epiphany. If someone cared so much about me, they would go through the trouble of helping me get out of here.

Rough Transition

Today was a long day. Every day is long. I spend every day transitioning into something new. New position. New hours. New dog. New class. New job. New e-mail. New password. New class. In the middle of it all, I did something dumb.
There was an order to not do something, needless to say, I did what I wasn't supposed to do. I am a misfit in the morning. It's not intentional either; I'm just ditsy in the morning.
Transitioning into the new job was not easy. It is almost complete. I spent the first part of the day calling people to reset a password. They gave me a hard time, I think I had to call them three times. That came to a halt after I started chewing out this stubborn agent that kept on repeating himself condescendingly. I do not know what the group of people are for if they refuse to help. Seriously. Just wait, karma will get them. They will have an issue with a password and then someone will be the same way with them. Ha!
I get a two week break from class. After I type my essay, that is. I will be studying for the test. I am going to study because my papers were great and points were docked because of technicalities. The instructor makes errors; guess what is going to be my gripe...
I have been spending time lecturing the father. For two days he was asking if I heard from the brother. The second day, he was calling and wanting mom's phone number. Thinking, thinking, no dad, he is busy and mom didn't hear from him either. I ask the brother if he contacted dad, if I hear anything ignore him. Dad is a little difficult to ignore, especially when repetition is his best buddy.
I visited dad, that's all I could hear about. Even after mom told him that the brother will call when he is good and ready. Me and the step sister, "He's busy!" I wish he paid attention to me. I wish he would spend money on me the way he does for the step siblings. I wish he would help me instead of going on about not having enough money.
It reminded me of when Grandma Maughan and one of my aunts bickering. One would call him and tell him what the other did. Then visa versa. It was an ongoing cycle every day. I thought about this when he said he was going to drive to Mountain Home to see what was going on. I told him, "Don't be driving over there and wasting your gas. No drama."
It has been quiet for the past few days, despite the chaos at work. I'm going to go to bed. I have an essay due on Friday and some house cleaning to do. Pinching pennies, I hardly have enough for anything. It will take a miracle this month to get through.

Pissed

I have been having a hard time with being single and living far away from everything, going to school, and commuting. Meeting anyone is virtually impossible. One guy got pissed because I wasn't doing anything to meet him. I told him what an inconsiderate prick he was for showing disrespect.
The last guy, he kept on saying he would meet me and did not. Nothing but a HUGE run around. I feel ashamed for even being interested. Why waste some one's time? If someone is really not interested, they should not act interested. It's hard enough trying to trust men again, then someone pulls this stunt? Am I really unattractive?
Then out of the blue, Josh comes back. I like him. My life is crap, I live in Nampa. Everyone remotely interested in me is in Boise. I have a job and I work all day, I have a crazy schedule. I go to school and my current class has a messed up schedule. I couldn't change anything if I tried.
Yesterday, I was supposed to meet Josh. He is going away until January. I had a paper due yesterday that I have been too tired to work on. Not to mention I have a cold and I am trying to get some sleep. I get up first thing and start working on the paper, I had a hard time focusing on it because I hate this class. He text me to text him later. As soon as I was finished I let him know. I got no response until 330. He fell asleep and had dinner plans.
I am getting so tired of living over here. I have no clue what to do. I have to commute and this takes up my time in the morning and after work. I'm stuck with trying to complete assignments while I am working. I cannot get a job closer to home because there is nothing here. It will be virtually impossible to get out of this because Nampa and Boise were in the top five worst places to buy a home. I can't take this crap anymore. I cannot meet anyone because I don't live in Boise and I go to school.

Child Abuse Food

Food I am aware of today is the food that I would never would have eaten yesterday. I never had brussel sprouts, okra, sweet potatoes, asparagus, or artichokes when I was growing up. I thought peas were gross...and I still do. I never liked crust on my bread nor did I like wheat. I never liked sauerkraut with those wienies, I made some the other day and I ate the whole thing.
I did not like the steaks that mom made. I do not remember if I ever liked meat loaf, I know how to make it and love it. I always liked spinach. My friend Sara adds mayonnaise to hers; she said that Italians do that. It is awesome, I make spinach like that. I love Flinstone dip! I remember loving those stuffed mushrooms at Grandma Berglund's house during the holiday season.
When I dated Andrew, his mother made all kinds of food. I never had sweet potatoes or acorn squash until I lived with him. I can't remember when I started eating brussel sprouts. I tried okra, it tastes good but it looks really gross. When I worked at Pizza Pipeline, I was introduced to artichoke hearts.
There is one dish that my mom always made that Justin hated. It is Texas Hash. I was bored one day and I looked it up. Mom said that Justin had taken the recipe and possibly threw it away. Here is the recipe, I am making it right now.

Ingredients
1 lb lean ground beef
1/2 onions chopped
1 celery chopped
15 ounces canned tomatoes diced
1/2 green peppers chopped
1/2 cup uncooked rice
1 teaspoon minced garlic
1/2 teaspoon chili powder
2 teaspoons salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1 1/2 teaspoons parsley

Directions:
Lightly spray a 9x13-inch baking dish with a cooking spray (Pam, or similar); set aside. Preheat oven to 375º. Saute the beef, onion and celery in a large skillet over medium heat until no pink remains in the beef and the onions are clear. Place the meat mixture in a colander to let the excess grease drain. Return the meat mixture to the skillet. Add the tomatoes, green pepper, rice, garlic and all remaining ingredients (spices/herbs) to the skillet. Stir well. Pour the meat/rice mixture into the prepared 9x13-inch baking dish. Cover the baking dish, and bake in a 375º oven for 30 minutes, or until the rice is cooked and soft.

Ribbit Ribbit

I went to see Dane Cook last night; it was awesome! I was pretty close to the stage, it was almost like I was standing in front of him. The wait was a pain in the ass. I made it early, I hoped to have somewhere to at least sit and wait...where it is warm. The Idaho Center is more ideal for the summer time, I think.
The ticket cost me $74. Third row from Dane. The seating sucked simply because of the fact that they use the same chairs that schools use in the auditorium. The plastic ones that you can latch together. It's bad enough I work somewhere that is not ergonomically correct, I have to sit in the most uncomfortable chairs that took a chunk of my paycheck. Sheesh. They made the Morrison Center look even better.
There were three comedians that opened. The first guy was hilarious. The second guy was hardly funny, in fact, he sucked. The third guy, he was pretty funny. I had such a fun time, I hope he comes back again. I hope it is sooner than a few years.
What else have I been up to? Not much, moping around. One guy I was trying to meet pretty much gave me the run around. He kept having an excuse. If you do not want to meet someone, DON'T FUCKING SAY YOUR GOING TO MEET THEM MORON!! In the middle of this fiasco, Josh sent me a comment. I thought he hated me.
Evidently, Josh is someone I had met before. Back when that prick Jeff was still alive and kicking. Josh is someone who gave me my first stripper experience. Yes, I watched strippers and I got a lap dance. He also taught me how to break when playing pool.
One day, I had Josh over when I was living at Rob's. Jeff was starting shit and put a STD fact sheet on the windshield of my car. Then Liz was harassing me (which is a double standard because she told me not too long before that she had genital warts and HPV). So, I went totally ape shit and spent the day fighting with those assholes.
Not too long after this incident, Josh was not speaking to me. I cannot remember, but it ended abruptly. This made me even more upset at Jeff.
So, about four years later, he is speaking to me. Main issue, I do not speak. Well, I'm shy and it takes me a little bit to warm up. Not to mention I speak more now because I do not have anyone telling me what I can and cannot say.
To make matters more interesting...before I get into it; MANY people have a criminal record in Idaho. I cannot think of very many people who have not been arrested. That aside, yes, I just got rid of a douche bag. But, he kept doing shit and hiding it from me. Anyway, Josh vanished because he was in prison for violating is probation. Back when he was 18, he stole a car radio. From what I looked up, he drove without privileges and that will get you arrested. Don't believe me? Ask Doug.
Josh makes me feel warm and fuzzy. He is someone I think of all day long. Perhaps we did have something before and I like him. I think he is a fantastic person. Hopefully, it will work out with him and maybe everyone will get a chance to meet him.

One More Week Til Dane

It has been two years since I had went to something. The concerts of Alanis Morisette and Filter still remain in my memory. Now, it's Dane Cook's turn. I will be in the third row from the stage.
The night before Thanksgiving I had an assignment, discussion question, and two responses due. The assignment was supposed to be due on Thursday. I work away on one for a couple of hours. I look at the calender and found it was the wrong one!! It was about 10 PM at this point. I had less than two hours to read over the other assignment, research, and type that up. At about five minutes before the deadline it was finished. I got an A on it. All I want to say is, thanks for rescheduling at the most inconvenient time.
Thanksgiving was a blast. Went up to Rick and JoAnne's with Mom and Justin. We looked through newspapers and had a fantastic meal. We saw a deer pass by. We had some fun sledding in Justin's car. Then on the way home, right around a corner, there was another deer...and Justin has fantastic brakes.
In other news, the new mystery man is probably history. He kept on making and breaking plans. Just when I was losing hope, Josh is back. More details later about his disappearance. I thought he left because all of the drama that Jeff started in Rob's house. Hopefully, I will have someone in my life so Paul will leave me be.

One Offended By Pride

I think that just about everyone is prejudice. It does not matter what race, religion, or sexual orientation. White people are racist. Black people are racist. Hispanics are racist. Native Americans are racist. Some straight people hate homosexuals. In a nutshell, pride shows hate.
I dislike gay pride like I dislike black pride. I do not like white supremacists. I do not like male or female chauvinists. I do not like activists. Simply because of the fact that they are double standards. These are people that hate others who hate them for who they are.
It's like Morgan saying that he cannot get a job because he is brown. No. Nobody will hire him because he has a criminal record and has a bad attitude. It's like the one guy that I worked with at the movie theater. He got in trouble for slacking off. He said that he was in trouble because he was gay. No, no, no. People use pride as a scapegoat to get away with anything.
I like the fact that I have different cultures, choices, and beliefs around me. People may say I'm naive and look at the world through rose glasses. I don't, I know people are hateful and live to dictate everyone else's lives when it is none of their fucking business.
I was discriminated against for the longest time, I still am. Not too long ago, I went to the smoke shop. This place never asks for my identification. 21 is the legal limit. There was an older gentleman before me. The cashier asked for his birth date and that was it. I go up there, she asks for my card. I lectured her on ageism. She started laughing at me. She stated that she is supposed to card if someone looks under 35. 35?? LEGAL AGE IS 21!! By the end of the sale, she asked if there was anything else. I told her, "Better service next time." (I love Idaho!)
I was discriminated against because I am from a small town. Teachers in Boise told me that I was only taught about farming. Fuck you, Borah! I was discriminated because I was in Special Education. People thought that I did not have the ability to remember who they were. Little did I know, I did not have a learning disability. I have a learning style that nobody could cater to. I was upset because students AND teachers bullied me and got away with it. I was stuck on the medication and in special ed??
Which makes me want to ramble about something off topic. What the hell is wrong with Arizona? Did Hitler possess the governor? The schools are measuring overweight students and sending them home with a note.
Anyway, the whole point of this is that bullying has gone too far. If technology was the same when I was going to school as it is today, we would be in a different place. Whatever happened to taking electronics away from students? Great, now I am aging myself. Things were taken away like Walkmans and beepers. (Beepers are pagers for those who do not know. (Pagers were before we knew what a cell phone was.))
If you have not caught on to what I am talking about it is cyberbullying. It seems that people forgot about those who have been put in the hospital or committed suicide until a man was taped kissing another man.
What is offending me is the gay pride turning this into hate toward gay people. We should have stopped bullying a LONG time ago. The jerk that posted the video online committed voyeurism. Then harassment and defamation of character by posting it onto the Internet.
People need to stop bullying, period. It should not matter what sexual orientation or color. If someone is being a bully or talking crap online, report it. Do not take vengeance into your own hands. Besides, if you believe in bad karma like I do; the bully is going to suffer anyway.

Shame on Matt Lauer

Who ever gave Matt Lauer the right to interrogate people? He should be interrogated for crappy journalism. Journalists do not interrogate, they investigate.
I have pissed and moaned about Kanye West. I am not alone when I say, "Shut-up, Kanye West!" Think twice when you are in the public eye before taking any action. He demolished his talent. I admired his work at one point, then he said that President Bush hated black people? Then that crap with Taylor Swift? Seriously, shut your yapper you biased prick.
I do not like President Bush either. I have two points of view on him. He is a big talker as well. Presidents are victims of quick generalization. The economy went to crap because of irresponsible financial decisions; not the president. Nature happened because of nature; not the president. Pollution happened because people are lazy; not the president.
I still think President Bush is a dumb ass and was afraid McCain was going to be President Bush II. I had long forgotten how I felt about him in the first place, he is a sweet man. I watched him in Looking for Lincoln and I think my fondness and inspiration was rekindled.
Then Matt Lauer had to come by and start crap. Why Matt? Why? Why did you give this type of interview when you have shown the public your infidelity?
He had to ask President Bush about what Kanye West said. Let sleeping dogs lay. President Bush is clearly upset when he said it was the worst point of his presidency. Really? It's a childish celebrity for crying out loud! Once again, Bush is turned into a crybaby just like Mr. West.
Then Lauer had to take the footage and interrogate Kanye. The "journalist" said it was normal??? Give me a break Matt! You upset President Bush and you upset Kanye. I could feel that guys pain. I could truly feel what Kanye was going through. Matt is a dick and a horrible journalist. Way to go.
Finally, Kanye made a smart decision. He cancelled his concert and did not perform for the Today Show. For once, I give Kanye a kudos. Good for Kanye for sticking it to crappy journalists that do not know any better.
To conclude, Mr. Lauer does not deserve the position he is in.

Things You Can Do With Carrots

Mind out of the gutter! By mistake, carrots were grown. I do not eat carrots; it would improve my vision though. Now, I have two huge bags of carrots. I have a bunch of random things in my cupboards. What to do...
So, I took a trip to www.food.com because it is my favorite website. It used to be recipezaar.com, but the cool name was changed to something more simple. Ick. Anyway, I found a recipe for carrot cake and then I found one for carrot oat muffins. A few substitutions here and there and viola!



Aren't you jealous? I also discovered that I like to cook with jalapenos. I do not like spicy food but if you cook a jalapeno; it is not spicy. Spice is subtle and it is tangy. I'm kind of sad my pepper plants died right now. I made this amazing dish with shrimp, garlic, white wine vinegar, tomatoes, and jalapenos. No pictures, very sorry. It was delicious.
On a side note, I am getting things taken care of. I soaked Dino and cleaned his tank. Frank got his nails done. Oreo got her shots, she has plaque. I also took her to get her hair done.

I Don't Believe In Unicorns, But...

But, I do believe in aliens. I spent a day trying to put videos about the possibilities of aliens into my favorites. The History Channel had some kind of alien show marathon for Halloween. I figured it would be the same crap I always watch.
On YouTube, I find the stronger arguments that they may exist. Experts have come across a theory called the landing pad theory. Most of the footage I watched on television was about how artifacts were found in Aztec and Ancient Egyptian findings. You would think that the figurines found would be birds but they are shaped like airplanes. Airplanes didn't even exist then. When airplanes were invented, people were seeing UFOs. What I think is that aliens do not like a little bit of competition. Either that or the pilots were breathing fumes and seeing stuff.
That wasn't what caught my attention. There is one mess of lines found in a mountain somewhere. Some experts speculate that it looks like a runway. So what? Check this out. Sometime during a world war, I can't remember if it was the Air Force, the military chose an island for a base. These people were so fascinated because they have never seen airplanes before. The natives got free food and they helped build the base in return. When the military left, the natives made shrines that look like airplanes in hopes that they would return. In essence, the artifacts point to people making objects for the beings to return. The mess of lines were made by people for beings. Maybe it's pretty far fetched.
Then there is an old tale from India. The story indicates that technology for nuclear bombs were used in a battle between beings and humans perished. I think it is a little weird or people are just imaginative. I can think of things that don't even exist and then they are available. I would give you a reference but since I have never published any of my writing, you are s.o.l. Anyway, what makes the tale so interesting is a village that perished long ago in a far off land. Experts believe that something as powerful as an atomic bomb struck this village.
So, I watch weird stuff. Maybe I can become an expert in paranormal activities. Perhaps I would like to get to the bottom of my dreams and see which ones are telling me something and which ones are not.
I had an unusual dream last night that I was hanging out at dad's house, which was still the trailer. Dad was there and Andrea was there. I have no idea why she was there, it was weird. Then there was something about Justin causing a disturbance and was arrested for it.
It was pretty weird. I had to ask how he was doing just to make sure nothing was going on. I always have to ask. Especially, since I foresaw a horrible accident a few years ago. I never questioned it until after someone died in a motorcycle accident. Do you blame me?
So, if you hear from me and I'm asking funny questions...I probably had a dream about you. Either that or I'm saying hey, trying to visit, or trying to gather information for some crafty idea.

Oreo

So, I did my normal fall coffee routine at Albertson's the other day. They have a peppermint mocha that is fantabulous. As I walked in, I saw an ad on the board about a dog that had to be given up. Their daughter is allergic to dogs.
I grabbed the e-mail address and sent them a message. The next day, I get a phone call to come take a look at her. He warned me she hasn't had a haircut. I set some plans aside to put together Dino's sunbathing area.
I come and take a look. Very sweet animal, her name is Oreo. Very fluffy and stinky. Plans came rolling, need to find a groomer and I need to give her a bath. She needs shots and a license. I figured that she would get shots anyway because the moment I moved to Nampa Frank got his, again.
Oreo said good-bye to some kids. The owners want to meet again so the wee one can say hello. Poor child. I broke a little girls heart. Well, parents do need to make tough choices.
I took her to meet mom and helped establish the connection to the Wii. I kick as at bowling. Strike, strike, strike. If it only it were that easy in person. Then I went home and fed the animals and gave Oreo a bath. It was like Christmas, I had a bunch of new suits that mom gave me. Now, I can get rid of the other ones that do not fit me anymore.
Today, I had to go purchase a set of doorknobs and deadbolts. Strange things have been happening in the home. I cam home to a partially open back door. Roger has been saying he has been hearing people. Haunted house? So, more doorknobs...Front door lock is going on the bedroom. I have to have dad come over with a drill to install a deadbolt. Grrrr. I hate hate hate this neighborhood. It's crap and the police are too lazy to do anything.
Anyhoo, I am off to bed. Long week ahead. Frank needs his nails to be done and Oreo is going to get her shots.

Invention for Basking

Poor Dino has no place to bask. It is very difficult to find a place that sells the right gear for a red eared slider. It's easy in the begining. He was only a couple of inches when I bought the little critter.
The first thing that went wrong was the floating dock with the plastic brackets and suction cups. Suction cups stay on things for a short while. The bottom part of the bracket was floating and Dino got stuck under water with it.
Then a pile of bricks was put into the tank. The tank is glass and Dino is an interior decorator. I took the bricks out. Which makes me think twice about going to a river bed and picking up a huge rock. Dino is 6 inches now and very strong.
I get a magnetic dock. Which did work until the water found a hole in the top and sunk the dock. Once again leaving Dino with no place to bask.
I go to Petco to buy a new light bulb. They of course, DO NOT have anything for my turtle that I BOUGHT FROM THEM. (It's kind of like Sears.) The guys helping me find a light bulb had the balls to say, "It's a requirement to have a basking area." Really? Tell that to Petco, jackass.
So, for the past couple of days I have been looking for a resolution. The resolution is requiring me to buy a new filter. I saw a Turtle Cliff, which is cool. It has a filter built into it.

Then I'm going to see if the heat lamp is still in the house. I need a milk crate and some of the chicken wire. I'm going to put together an area for the heat to come in and for Dino to sun bathe. Then I am thinking of putting together a dock from items from the dollar store and maybe get some turf for reptiles to cover it.

No Regrets

Sometimes I wonder if I ever made a mistake. Did I make a mistake for letting him live here? I made the mistake of helping him. Sometimes I think I made a mistake by leaving him. He confirmed it wasn't a mistake the same day by posting pictures of their hands with rings on them.
He still owes me $200. Never chipped in on bills. Never fixed the things he broke. Gradually, I get my life back together. Slowly, things are vanishing that he did and I recover some things that were lost. My computer mouse was in his yard sale crap across the street.
The deal: fix the damage or no Internet access. Roger fixed the hole above the door. I cleaned up the back patio. I cleaned the duct tape gunk off the floor. Dad helped me take down the chain link fence and I took down the chicken wire.
My Internet access was being hogged the other night. What is more important? Certainly not his welfare. Isn't he with someone else? Isn't he sponging off of someone else? I had to fight with him while he lived here to respect my education. My education is still being disrespected when I have to take time off to fix what he did. He is causing a commotion with my education when I cannot access the Internet. I am more important. I pay for everything here. My education is more important than some low life who does not have a job. No more sympathy.
He tried to become a friends with benefits. What benefit do I get? I can be my own friend with benefits, thank-you. He probably did the same thing to me as he is doing to Sandy. I tell him no.
I had to fight with Qwest about screwing up my Internet. They said something was wrong with the pin. For four days, I had to be plugged directly into my modem. Here he was suddenly wondering what happened to the Internet when he supposedly wasn't using it. He needed it to get some one's number for a job. Really?
Go to the library. Go to McDonald's. Make Sandy, your wife, get Internet. You fucking virus. As soon as my Internet was fixed, he noticed. I told him he broke the deal. What deal? Um, fix the damage you did. He said try having five-year-old. Yeah, and his daughter is in school.
Probably selling crap on Craigslist without Sandy's knowledge. Getting more pills. Playing Farmville. Wrecking her home. When he lived here, I purchased another computer so he could look for a job on another. He could have had a job by now. Dumb ass. He said not to worry, he can go get access at McDonald's.
Finally, he is leaving my life. By the way, the dating sites are shit. I deleted all my profiles. I will hope for the best. I am still trying to meet the new guy. I don't think it's going to happen. Screw this shit.

America's Catch 22

While taking Cultural Diversity, I learned about Hispanics. Puerto Rico is U.S. territory. Puerto Ricans can come and go as they please to our country. They are obligated to join the military. Puerto Rico does not have the right to vote. True story.
Native Americans and Hispanics were treated the same way on this continent. Land was taken from both. America battled with Mexicans in the Mexican war and pretty much shoved them off the premises. I understand that Mexican territory exists in America, but only in isolated areas.
What is the big deal with people having a fit over illegal immigration? It cannot be jobs. The whole planet is in economic ruin, jobs are scarce for everybody, try again. Are people afraid of learning a new language? Afraid of needing an interpreter? I have read nasty comments of people saying, "SPEAK ENGLISH!!"
Here is an interesting observation I have made. Many Americans want people to speak English. Then people bitch if they speak to a foreigner that can speak English. Don't believe me? Okay, you might want to think twice when you make a comment when you call a company and someone with a Filipino accent answers. Our ancestors came from other countries to build this country and steal it from others. Perhaps America should isolate itself from the rest of the world?
Shakira tried to protest for illegal immigrants and gave the weakest argument. For someone who is intelligent, I do not think she is bright enough to be an advocate for immigrants. Her opinion was that a woman in a domestic abuse situation may end up being arrested for not having legal documentation. If she does not have legal documentation, why is she here anyway? People need to learn about the past and the present.
I think that America and Mexico should unite. I do not mean America needs to take over Mexico. People need to get along with each other. This illegal immigration business needs a rest. Give Puerto Rico voting rights or give the country back. America should learn Spanish and Mexico should learn English. Every person should have equal working rights. Everyone needs to hurry up and get along, remember, Hispanics are the fastest growing minority group.
That is just my two cents.

Advanced Heating and Cooling = DANGER

The last time I had someone that tried to rip me off was when I had my Dodge Neon and I was taking it to the Sundance Dodge Dealership. They refused to work on anything after hours of not being with a car. A gas furnace is no different and just as deadly if nobody fixes it correctly. A leaky gas furnace can cause people to die from the toxic fumes and can make a house explode. Who here understands this?
So, it takes about two hours to find people to fix the gas tank. Intermountain Gas does not do anything, they just provide the gas and take your money. I received a phone call from a guy named Stew from Advanced Heating and Cooling. This is how it went before he got there. (Remember, at this point there is no gas leaking. I also work alone and cannot come home in an emergency.)
Stew: What is the problem with the gas heater?
Me: The coupler keeps going out.
Stew: Is it constant or intermittent?
Me: This happened a year ago twice.
Stew: If it goes out like that it is the gas valve. A new gas valve will cost between $350 to $400. I can fix the coupler you will only be throwing your money away. I can show you how to fix it yourself so you will not have to pay anyone to fix it anymore.
So, I let him come over. I had to leave in a half an hour for work. I was calling from 8am until 1030 am, that is how hard it is to find someone to help me. He takes it apart, replaces the coupler, and does not show me how to do anything. The house at this point stinks from the gas. I figured it would be something that would air out. I ask him how much it was, he said not to worry about it. This is where I should be suspicious because of the smell and because he is not having me pay, right? No, I let him leave and I hurry to work because I am running late.
Roger calls my phone at around 7pm. He tells me that the house smells strongly of gas. I told him someone was over. I tell dad I need someone to check the house and check the dog. I call Stew and he says that the smell should be gone by then. He advises to check the connections and shut the gas off if there is still a problem.
I spoke with dad and he said that the smell was faint and the house must have aired out. I come home and it smells really weird. I called the emergency line for Intermountain Gas and tell them about the smell. The gas person came out and started with a reading of 3.2 and when he got closer to the heater it was 4.5. I am beginning to feel angry at Stew. The gas valve was broken and was leaking gas.
So, the gas person shut the water heater off and put a red tag on it. He told me when I can get it fixed to give him a call to remove the tag. Great. I called around to see which company Stew was working for. The places that are 24/7 are not answering the phone or returning phone calls.
I called Stew in the morning. He came back and tinkered with the gas heater some more. I figured if he broke it he would fix it. Guess again.
Stew: Well, just what I thought. The gas valve is bad.
Me: The gas was not leaking until you worked on it. The gas company said that the gas valve was broken.
Stew (trying to use some rhetoric): Well, I try to help you out and you accuse me of breaking your heater.
Me (I was educated in Critical Thinking): What company to you work for?
Stew: Advanced.
Me: Get out!
To me, the whole thing just seemed deliberate. Tells me it's the gas valve, it was leaking gas after, and now it was just what he thought. I call around trying to find someone who can fix this. The gas valve was ruined at this point and I am without hot water. I called the gas company to see if I could get anything. I called dad to see if there was any good advice. Call the company! Nobody is answering and I have to leave a message. I am pissed.
I called more people and I finally come across someone. He works for Todd's and he was working on a roof. I explained the situation to him and I am begging for help at this point. He thought the situation was messed up. He came over and put the heater back together. The gas company took it apart.
Michael made sure I was not going to have a leak again. Intermountain wanted to send someone tomorrow, I work all day and my classes begin I cannot do that. Michael was concerned and did not want to leave the gas running without someone signing off on it. The same gas guy came over, he was already at the house at 1am. Everything checked out okay. This seems a little weird as well, the gas leak was mysteriously gone.
But, it's fixed. Michael was really cool and he didn't charge for the service call. I am going to be raising some bones to get a new water heater and I'm going to be calling Todd's. I might even have them look at the wiring in the house. Finally!! I get to take care of some stuff.
By the way, I took down the chain link fence in the back. Dad has it and I also chucked a few random things into his truck. I took down the chicken wire. Roger fixed the hole above the door!! My house is looking less trashy. Now, I have to do something about the pile of twigs in the back and the tree stump out front.

Circus

I wish I could just get a different energy resource instead of messing with Intermountain Gas or Idaho Power. Idaho Power is a scam, they turned up the price by $200 a month last winter just to upgrade the meters. Thanks for making it hard to pay the gas bill which is about $200 during a time when I was going through a hardship.
Never pay for a house warranty. If there was any advice I would give, never buy a warranty. They do not do crap for you. I had things that I thought was under the warranty and it says that it is covered. They will come back and say that you owe them because they do not cover it. What exactly do they cover? Nothing.
Gas is the worst energy source. If I had any power and money, I would switch everything out for something else. Even better, I should not have bought the house if I understood what a fiasco it is to fix ANYTHING. People are lazy as hell over here. LAZY.
The first time my gas went out, I had no idea who to call. Intermountain Gas? No. I had to call and call and call to find someone to come and fix it. This was August of last year. It is nothing but a big scam. The guy came over and charged $233 to repair it.
He took a bunch of stuff off and put different parts on. He said it would be under warranty for longer than a year. The next month rolls buy and it is doing the same exact thing. It isn't under warranty for him and fix it again. The paperwork is the most important thing to keep, I had it and it said he has to fix it free if it stopped working again.
Today it is not working, again. I called Overall Plumbing and they said it was out of warranty. Scam artist, I will never go back to you again. The people that are more affordable cannot come over today because I have to work. I cannot call in because I am the only one that closes. Go figure.
There is one that advertises 24/7, guess what? They are not 24/7. They said that they would not be here until Monday. What the fuck??? People, what the hell is wrong with you? Why do you have to make it complicated to keep warm water? It is starting to get cold outside and you are making me jump through hoops just to get something fixed.
What makes me even more upset is my dad. I tried to get in touch with him so I can get assistance with getting in touch with someone that is not going to charge me a ton of money. I am never ever ever ever going to call him again to help me with anything. He kept on saying he could be here, hey great but I need help locating a technician that can be here after 11:30pm. Look, my room mate works. I cannot leave him a note about the water heater being a piece of shit. I cannot stay home because I work alone on Saturday. I do not have very much money. I can only afford maybe $100and that is it.

Mean Neighbor Lady

That is exactly what I am. I have come to the understanding that people like to trespass on my property whether I have a fence or not. The neighbor behind me thinks he can come into my yard. The kids next door think they can come into the yard.
I have lost a step ladder from the backyard. I have the other ladder inside. I do not have a shed nor can I afford one. I could make something on the patio but then I would not have a view of the backyard.
Roger told me that someone was wandering in the backyard at seven in the evening. Of course, this is a person that can not make an educated guess and exaggerates everything. He speculated that the woman he was dating was a cheater. He even said that the police were across the street yesterday. I do not believe the statements are true and I think he is paranoid.
Everyone knows about the cat problem. Every time I turn around, I have to scoop the yard. It is like I have a cat and clean a litter box every week, except for it is my yard and the cats are not mine. When people walk their dogs, they bring them to my yard so they can go to the bathroom. I yelled at one guy already when I came home one night. Then today, this girl with a Labrador was in my yard talking to the neighbor.
"Any reason you need to be in my yard?" I ask her. She said she was visiting the neighbor and then mimicked me. I scowl at her, "Get off my property!" I think she was a little shocked and scared as she quickly got out of my yard. My glare can pierce your heart, okidoki? Some people let my sweet demeanor trick them.
Sure, I am not nice. I am tired of people just going on my property just because they feel like it. Things have been stolen, I had a yard decoration stolen from the front yard. I am tired of scooping up after every one's animals. The only way to make it stop is to chew them out for being there.
The neighbor across the street is next. There is a couple renting a house down the road. The husband has attempted to hit on every female on the street. He even likes to walk into every one's yard. He tried to start a fight between me and Sandy. As if I don't have an issue already, right? He told her that Paul was coming over and I was crying on his shoulder.(Paul does come over, I do not cry on his shoulder. He will do yard work, borrow stuff, and fix the mower.)He then asked her, "Doesn't that make you want to kick her ass?" She told him she doesn't have anything against me. That right there, what he did, I consider it a threat. I think that should be a threat through a third party, I do not believe Nampa has any laws for that. I think I am going to ask them tomorrow.

Sprint Customer Service

What we see here, is a person who went from level one to level three because an agent did not know when to stop. I never had AOL, but I have had service that has the same problem. Qwest does it, they ask one million questions that they call an interview to sell more crap. Sprint does it and they try to give you credit to sign up for longer, whoever falls for that has no logic.
September, I upgraded my phone. I never knew it dropped calls until people finally started to call it a little over 30 days later. It never dropped on anyone else because I was not at home.
Whenever I call when I am home, it drops phone calls like hot potatoes. On top of it, it acts funny. I didn't notice this until the other night. The phone was lighting up and showing the time. It did nothing else. Lo and behold, these text messages show up and someone was asking if I was mad at him. No, I wasn't mad it was taking the phone 20 minutes to give me a message. Great.
So, today I am feeling anxious. I have not heard from anyone, I have not seen any texts. I send a guy a message, I was thinking of deleting all of my online profiles because I am not getting anywhere with anyone. He told me that he sent me a message earlier. It is official, the Rumor touch is crap. My other Rumor did not drop calls and received texts. It was durable but not water proof. It was durable, believe me. The phone has been dropped and took a couple of trips across the room.
I called Sprint, the guy ask me how long it has been doing this. Well, I rarely get a phone call so I noticed this fairly recently. He told me that I was within the 30 day warranty. I told him I would go to the store and see if there is something different.
I go to the store. Wait for about 20 minutes for someone to help me. I am not within the 30 days. I am six days out of it. I am infuriated, Sprint has given me the run around again. NEVER upgrade with these people, NEVER.
I call them to give them a piece of my mind. The agent told me that I was outside of the warranty and the next person could do the same thing. I told her I wanted a supervisor because I am getting the run around. I take a break from school so I can fix the house, not mess with a cell phone.
I get a supervisor and he was a real ASSHOLE. I tell him the story and he gets snappy. He tells me I am being disrespectful and that he is trying to help and he cannot do it with me screaming at him. I told him I am not screaming at him and if he wants me to, I will. He gives me more lip and I tell him I want to speak with his supervisor.
He tells me that he can fix my problem. I told him no. He gave me more attitude, "Well, I will I will tell them that you are being uncooperative and that you are screaming at me." As I said, "Excuse me???" and asked for his identification, he put me on a hold. This pissed me off even more. I waited and waited. He was stupid enough to insult my intelligence as well as he was dumb enough to get back on the phone. So, I pushed his buttons back. I called him every racist name I could think of and told him that he never treats anyone like this.
He finally transfers me to another supervisor who was not being a shit like him. I yelled at her for 20 minutes and told her what the supposed supervisor did. I was not yelling until that prick got on the phone with me.
She finally got me to calm down. I told her that my agreement should be waived so I can go to another carrier that will give me respect. She told me that the text issue could be coming from another phone. Perhaps, but I think it is mine because of the weird thing it was doing the other night. Finally, we came to the conclusion that I need to take it to someone who can troubleshoot the phone. So, on my next day off, I'm headed to Boise to see if I can get down to the bottom of my phone problem.
Today, I gathered some twigs and tied them. I also clipped some stuff away in the garden. I apologized to the new guy for being bummed out. I haven't met him and I really want to. One of his daughters is terribly ill and he is taking care of her. Hopefully, she is on the road to recovery.

Precious Time Being Wasted

I already had my time wasted. I spent nearly two years thinking that someone loved me only to find out 1. He hides things from me. 2. He also has a son that is the same age as his daughter by another woman. 3. He had a pill addiction. 4. He married the woman across the street.
Forgive me if I am wrong, do I really need another person to waste days or even years of my life? I spent the past couple of days off going to Boise just to meet someone. He was wrapped up in work and is not comfortable with me meeting his daughters yet. All I wanted to do was meet him. Then he went to install a door into the ex's house and has not reached me since. Getting back with her? I don't know, I thought he wanted to meet me to.
Why in the hell are these people wasting my time? I get dating profiles and nobody is sending me a message. Except for the occassional loser or the guy who just wants my body. Fuck you people. You know what? I am better off on my own. I can't fuck myself over or waste my time waiting for myself.
I am really sad right now. I do not have anyone to go hang out with. I do not have anyone to go out drinking with. I had to be alone on my birthday. Fuck people, nobody gives a flying fuck about me.
I passed my classes and I am on break. I spent the past week alone. FUCK YOU PEOPLE.

I Don't Know

I really don't know what to do with myself. I think it's because I have all of this overwhelming crap. I want to find someone I am compatible with even though someone I thought loved me ruined my home.
Plenty of Fish, not my cup of tea. People that I do not want to communicate with will not leave me alone. People I do want to communicate with do not talk to me for very long at all. So, I go to someplace I had left for Paul. My year book.
I go there I can bid on pictures and people can bid on mine. I can flirt and battle. I run across someone that I saw on plenty of fish.
He is asking me all of these questions. Oh yes, how come you never wrote me on plenty of fish. How the heck should I know? Maybe I can communicate with people easier on year book. What do you think? He asks questions, I almost think I made a mistake even trying to find a different venue. Yes, I was randy and wanted to flirt with you! He already knows I am shy and why I do not trust anyone right now. Older with some kids? Why not? Everyone I meet has kids.
Paper is due by midnight. I am full of anxiety. I have no idea about anything. Not a clue. I have no idea why I am looking for anyone. I think I want someone to sit and do homework with. I need someone to go for a jog with. I need someone to go grocery shopping with. Grr.

More Time To Myself

At work and at home. My position consists of showing people where policies are and what they mean. Sometimes it is other people showing me things and helping me become more knowledgeable of products. I think there are a ton of cool products; I do not get to use them. I work ten hours a day and for the time being, I am exempt from overtime. Three days to myself...what to do.
I should sign up for overtime because I am going to need the hours in case Roger decides to move. Then I won't care if I am living alone. Maybe the occasional company, Mr. Kennedy?? How do you urge a man to come visit? I keep giving him sparklies to entice him, but he seems to be preoccupied. Sad, sad, sad.
As far as dating life goes...it just goes and never stays. I have one guy that seems to think he can tell me what to do. I think I am going to have to add a disclaimer about dating someone who is a writer and is online all day.
What happened was that you know who read my writing all the time and kept on throwing temper tantrums about things that had nothing to do with him. I would accidentally go to a website involving dating and he insisted that I was cheating. The new guy tells me to stay off of Plenty of Fish. Really? Did I say we were together? I think not. I do visit dating sites now and have every right to. If my schooling and job is disrespected, you are going to get the boot. If my writing is read, do so at your own risk. I do have some naughty stuff in there and, yes, about previous lovers. It's life, give me a break or hit the road.
It's my goal to live the human experience. That is the purpose of my writing and making videos. That is the reason why I get tattoos and piercings. Perhaps it is why I have a car and live independently in my own house.
School is going great. I finished writing my other essay last night. Now, I need to polish them off by adding quotes and citations. Then, it is break time. I do not have a break. I have to fix the shit that Paul did to my home and clean up the mess my tree made. I have to bundle a huge pile of twigs, if you want to join, you can.

Quit Yer Bitchin

One thing I have to say, Boise, shame on you. Shame on you for continuing to build houses that nobody is going to buy. Do you honestly think that people are going to have enough money to pay for a $250,000 to $400,000 house? Seriously, nobody has that type of money. Even if they do, more than likely they work for Micron and are at high risk for being laid off. Available jobs pay between $7.25 to $10.00 an hour.
Shame on Idaho for all of those empty buildings. You and I can both agree that small business owners will rent the building for a short time. For those who are still in business, kudos to you. Keep working hard at keeping your head above water.
To all of those people who are griping about the construction market. Yes, you. You know very well that eventually the buildings are going to stop. Maybe, some day, Idaho will cut down on the budget some more and stop construction on the roads. Think about this, agriculture. Have you ever thought that by building all of these houses and empty business establishments, you are wasting land that should be for farms and wild life?
Instead of sitting in your pity party, why not become a farmer? People need food. Yes, we can grow our own gardens. I know that I will not grow a garden next year. I don't even have the time to mow my grass or clean my house or car. Do something for your community and cultivate the land. I think we should put the whole thing into perspective and change it around.
Urbanization is wasting land. Become a farmer.

New

Like usual, I have been crabby. The room mate's girlfriend knocks on my door all the time. I'm always in the middle of working on a paper. Leave me alone, God damnit. I decided to call my school. I need time to fix things and lecture people how important it is for me to complete my school work.
I am distracted. I was told to get cracking on making a clone. Should I get an artificial donor? I don't see anyone appealing that wants to date me, why not? Oh yeah, I don't make as much as I used to and if I got insurance it probably not have the same coverage that Aetna had. Damnit. If only that one guy...Maybe, I should urge people to talk to him. No...that is going to far. Even for me.
So, come to find out, Paul ended up going to the hospital for nearly overdosing. It is on his record that he is a narcotics abuser. Serves him right. He was talking across the street to the neighbor about him and his wife. Evidently, they got married. Good, she is getting what she asked for. A drug addicted mooch. I have every reason why not to associate with anyone of the opposite sex. I decided, I am my own soul mate. God, I hope those fuckers move soon. Isn't it fucked up in the head to marry someone across the street a month after you break up?
I have been pissy at work. One day off a week is burning me out and I am starting to swear. I had a last minute interview, which was fun. I sent her an e-mail thanking her before I left from working overtime. I have the day off, work on papers ALL day long. I come to work worn out.
Associate, "It's going to suck because your not on our team anymore...I hate you." Your pulling my leg, when did I get placed on another team? "You are help desk now." What?? Really?? "Check your e-mail, I sent you an e-mail telling you how much I hate you." Sure enough, I got the new position. No, the associate's e-mail was not hateful. She was joking.
It is a weird feeling. I had no idea how my shift was going to change. I will not be a temp anymore. During my first call, the new boss person grabbed me and had me sit with the new team for a bit. I even took some calls that I have no knowledge of, I liked it. The next new change, I start in the new building on Monday.
It is back to the ten hour shifts. I still have some overtime. I will be spending Sunday working on two papers. Oh yes, about school, the counselor is giving me two weeks off after these classes. Yay, a break! I told her I have a ton of crap to fix and a tree I have to bundle up. The classes will be split again after. Which is a relief because it has been years since I have taken Algebra. I am hoping this is not where I fail.

Polite Way of Saying Eff You

I went to get a new phone. I got a new Rumor that is a touch screen and it is purple. Yay, people are finally coming out with purple electronics! So, this comes with an SD card which makes me happy because I had to buy the last one.
I grabbed the SD card from the old phone that I killed. I watered it on the patio. My friend asked me if I was trying to make it grow. I told him the screen was fuzzy, does that count?
I have a device that the card came with. It was gone. I sent Paul a message, why do you think you can take my things and please bring me back my memory transfer thing. I changed my pin the other day because I was getting the silent treatment. I did not get a response back about the thing he took either.
I came home yesterday and found it in the mail box. Again, without a thank-you or a hello. I get a message later. Paul told me that he was in the hospital because he nearly overdosed and died. Really? He asked if I changed my pin again and he was trying to sell stuff.
I told him that I am having trust issues and that I am depressed. He told me that he was depressed and nearly overdosed. My final response, I don't see any reason why you should be depressed. You already found a new girlfriend quickly, betrayed me, and you have your daughter. I have not heard anything since and no pin for him.

I Play Harder

I am burned out right now. I have to work overtime and I hope it is cancelled. I have too much to do.
So, now that I have been used and walked all over, I decided to make some changes. I can because I pay for everything around here and everything is mine. Paul has been using my Internet connection across the street. The old bat does not have her own anything evidently.
I was pissed at the way I have been treated. So...I thought about the Internet. Change the key. I changed the key and I heard nothing for a couple of days. Paul parked in the alley for some weird reason.
The next day I get a message, "Why did you change your Internet settings??" I lied and told him that my Internet wasn't working. Then he said, "I need the connection so I can get money for Nini's lunch." I don't know what to tell you, "Why can't Sandy take care of it?" I told him that I would give him the pin later.
I did not call him back. The next day, "Can I please have the pin?" Hmm, no not really. He told me that I was on my own and that it was my fault that my house looked like crap. So, my response was, "You left me by myself with the mess you made. You are on your own." His response was that he said that he would fix it.
I forwarded the message he sent me. Then I said, "No fix, no Internet. Terms and conditions apply if you want Internet." He went off on a tangent about how much he hated Bri for leaving him with this mess. I didn't respond. Finally, "What are the terms?"
1. Take the chicken wire off my fence. 2. Pay me my money back. 3. Fix the hole above the door. 4. Sandy can never be in my yard EVER again. 5. Fill that hole you dug in my front yard. 6. That caulking around the window sills? Take that crap off.
So, he is looking for someone to pull the tree stump. He better plan on fixing the mess he made otherwise, no Internet access and it is small claims court. I have the upper hand, not him.

Should Be Friendly, but...

I want you guys to know what I am feeling. I want people to know that I did not go off for no reason. Should I be ashamed? Probably. However, I really do not care because I have been tolerating a ton and not saying too much. So, I live in a money pit now. I have a huge hole around a tree stump in the front yard. I did not dig that nor did I ask. I have a hole above the door. I have fences in places that I need to take them down. I did not do any of that. I have caulking around my windows that I am having a hard time removing without damaging the windows.
It is bad enough I am emotionally hung over. In the beginning of this carnival, my garbage can was missing. It was across the street. I had to argue to get what I pay for every other month back. If my yard was inside a house that I could lock, I would be happy.
He was borrowing my hose, sprinkler, and lawnmower...without asking first. I feel like I am being used. Much like being stolen from by Sandy like she did my guy. It was her that was bringing him gifts before I dumped him. He got a new watch and new clothes. There is no way I am going to believe that it was platonic.
I told him, ask me first. Put it back and the answer is no. He is sneaky about returning the items. He does not come and say hello and he does even say thank-you. Why does he feel the need to walk all over me?
Then, he posted pictures of engagement rings. Oh la dee da, my daughter deserves a good mother and blah, blah, blah. That is it, I am tired of this. That arrogant prick told me that I was cheating on him all the time. So, I went off on him. I will be damn sure that they do not cross my path ever again.
I ranted and I posted the video. He goes off how I am threatening him. The phrase was specifically that he ruined my home and I hope she has insurance for the damage that he will do to hers. He said that was a threat. He told me that he recorded everything and will take it to the police. For what? I was not threatening anyone. And he thinks he can tell me what videos to post? What? Incriminating evidence of the crap I am enduring from him? Go ahead, I tell him. That only will give me leverage.
I told me to not have anyone associated with me to contact him. Excuse me? I never told anyone to contact him. People had my back at their own will. I told him that they are not welcome on my property ever again and I certainly did not like seeing her in my backyard. He told me that since I went off, he will not fix what he damaged. Um, yeah, and perhaps I can take him to small claims...thinking about it.
So, he was also avoiding available jobs and trying really hard to get the job with the government. I asked him, "What if they don't hire you?" He refused to answer the question. 8/20 came and went, I asked him, when are you supposed to pay me back? He stated, "When I get a job, dumb, dumb." I asked him about the one job. He said things don't always work as planned. I told him, "That is is exactly what I said, wasn't it?"...dumb dumb.
When will this ever stop? They are across the freaking street. It feels so demeaning. It makes me more and more mad thinking about everything that I have to fix and all the time I do not have to do it. I feel incredibly stupid for even helping him or dating him. I should have let him leave the first time he went off on me about crap that had nothing to do with him. Coulda, shoulda, woulda.
I am glad we are not together. The whole situation feels condescending, coniving, and unforgiveable. I just wish I dumped him sooner before he wrecked my home.
On a positive note, I have a room mate moving in soon. There is a new opening for the position that I want. I just hope I don't get burned out before I can get it.

The World Today

You know how leery I am about letting other people live here. Things vanish, get broken, and get moved. I have a hard time finding someone decent to live here. People today do not have a car. What? I have a car and I commute, what the freak is going on?
So, guy number one. (Women are not responding to my ad.) This fellow had came down from Alaska and is a fisherman. Problem, he is in Emmett and does not have a car to drive here. Here is my dilemma, I have a paper due and the spell check was down so I am on schedule...not ahead. His family or friends cannot bring him here because of drama. Really? Why is that?
Fellow number two, just arrived in Boise. Keeps calling me while I am on the highway. I would have to meet him after work on Monday. Do I have the time? Probably not because I have to begin research for my final project for two classes and I have a 1,500 word essay due every week.
Fellow number three, very thick Spanish accent. Lives in a house by himself. I told him I have a boyfriend that lives here. It almost seems that every guy that calls is under the impression that I am looking for a date. It's absurd.
What is really pissing me off are the people that do not have a vehicle and do not know their way around Nampa...or Idaho for that matter. I do not have any time whatsoever. I do not have enough money to be driving to another town to meet someone. Not to mention, it would be a situation where I would be expected to play taxi driver. The answer is no, okay?
I got to go. I have a car to pay for so I can get around and a deposit to make. Almost time to start doing direct deposit. Too bad the time card isn't something I can slide a card into. I miss that about other jobs. I have to enter time into a time card every week. The current one I have to make up a complicated password and I do not have a way to use a link to get to the website for the time card.

Been Busy

So, plenty of my tree branch is gone. Rick came over to chop it up. Today, half of it was removed. I still have a few limbs that dad said he will come and get. Leaves are everywhere.
Yesterday, I saw my cousin Randy Jo. I was sitting minding my own business when she appeared. The person that lead her in sat her next to me. So, she got to listen to my crazy calls for about a couple of hours. She is a little nervous. I told her that the customers are not so bad. Much of the job takes practice and when I began, I didn't know anything. Come to think about it, the next person knows as much as I do.
When I got home, I decided to water the grass. I was calling around to see what I could do about Frank. He's been paying attention to this pink circle on his bottom. I am getting aggravated because I did not have enough to make a house payment. The last of my retirement was just transferred to my checking account. Of all the crazy crap. So, I decided to water everything. I am by myself to do yard work and I cannot remember how to start my stinking lawnmower.
I work in the garden until I realize my cell phone was on the table that was being showered by the sprinkler. Great. I don't want another agreement. I have been avoiding it like the plague. I make snide remarks about how Sprint wants to give me a measly $50 to re-join for 2 years. Seriously, not worth it.
So, I move the phone and take it apart so it can dry. Slowly but surely, it will work. I had to run around looking for an older phone. I found it, but all of the information that was stored in it was gone. At least, I can call a vet for Frank. So, I have been trying to gather numbers until my other phone is working again.
Today,I took Frank to the vet. It cost me $175 and I have to nurse him for a few days. Some gland ruptured and got infected. Poor dog. Right now, Frank is a little bit loopy and growly and whiny.
I went to the interview. I was a success; however, my accommodations do not match what she can do. I told her I can do pretty much anything, I am online doing school. She only had ten hour shifts available. I could do it as long as there is not a tedious amount of overtime. Until next time. I should be rolling over to HP soon, so I have something else to look forward to.
Other cool news, I found a praying mantis on my house. It is in the garden right now. I am really tired right now. I spent a little bit picking up leaves. I need to clean the house. I would have someone looking at the room but the guy seems to be a creep to me. Hopefully, this round with the American Classifieds will help. Last time, I had an ad for a whole month and nobody called. The paper is free for crying out loud!!
so, happy thoughts. I get paid on Friday. Until I get a new room mate, minimum payments.

Relationship No No

There is more to the story that I hardly ever spoke of. Sometime around the beginning of my relationship with Paul, I should have let him go back to Twin Falls. He would read writing that I wrote months before I ever knew him.
He would take it personal and send me messages because it freaked him out. He thought everything I wrote was about him. If I hate something about my life, he took it personal. Going to my writing and turning it into drama is grounds for terminating a relationship. I should have ended it at that.
He would tell me that I am dating other guys. I should have. I have no time to see other people let alone go out and have fun. I have been supporting him and taking him out. He thought I had time?
I have male friends that are platonic. Yes, I did date Doug. No, I did not want to tell him because he got upset at my writing for no apparent reason. I made some comments on Facebook and Doug responded to them. Paul came along and made a rude comment whenever Doug said anything. Doug started to send me messages directly to avoid offending Paul. He was unapologetic about it. He got jealous about other people that I would mention. He would say, "Do you ever mention your girlfriends?"
Yes, I do. I talk about girls that are my friends. I do not mention them very often because I do not speak to them very often. He said the same thing every single time I spoke of a guy that I know. Or if it was a girl with a guy's name.
So, along came Sandy. For about a couple of weeks before I dumped him, he was hanging out with her. I was waking up alone. He said that he was trying to leave me alone so I can do my homework. Until three or six in the morning? I don't believe him. He said that she is a single mother and is 44. What difference does that make? I'm flirting with someone who is 38, what does that tell you?
Today, I am pissed at Paul, Sandy, and my dad. Why my dad? Because, when he got a doorknob, he did not get one with a deadbolt. Now, I don't have one key for all of the doors. In fact, I do not have any keys for the back door. I was dumb and locked myself out this morning.
I am pissed at Paul for getting rid of my spare doorknobs that I do have a key to and switching all of the doorknobs all the time. He said he cannot find the bag of doorknobs. Honestly, I think he sold them to make a profit for himself. He sold all of my weed mat for a profit. I paid for his bike, he sold it and never paid me back.
I am pissed at Sandy for letting him stay over there in the first place. I am stuck being alone and helpless. I cannot afford to get rid of the tree that fell. I do not have the time to fix the hole in the wall that Paul made. He was busy with her and his shit to even fix anything. I cannot get in touch with Paul to get some help.
I go across the street. Paul is not there. Her teenage daughter answered the door. He was at the YMCA where Sandy works. I am screwed. I am pissed. I said that her mother is a slut.
This is the only time Paul is responding. He said that it is wrong for me to a call a 44 year old mother a slut to her 14 year old daughter. He was rude to my friends. Him and Sandy walked all over me. He has the brass to tell me what I can and cannot say? Think about it. Her daughter is a teenager and old enough to realize that it would be a battle ground to be hanging out with one of her friends boyfriend. He is showing the kids that it is okay to date someone and sleep at another woman's house.
Come to think about it, if it were me, it would be okay for him to talk to me like that. Wouldn't it? There is a double standard going on. I was suspected of sleeping around because of stories I wrote. I was suspected of sleeping around because I have male friends. Now, that I am suspect him of doing it, I can't say anything?
I don't know when this will ever be over. I just can't get over that fact. I wake up every morning remembering all the crap he did to me and I have to take it sitting down silently. It probably wasn't right to say it in front of her daughter.
If my mom did that when I was 14, I would expect the same thing. You do not have someone else's boyfriend stay at your house. If it were me and I had a teenage daughter and I had someone else's boyfriend staying at my house, I would be a shame to society. There would be a big fat girl fight. If it was because of the kid, sounds like she needs to discipline her kid to go to bed at a curfew. Hello??? Someone needs to lecture Sandy. Apparently, she is either screwing him or she needs a lecture on what you should not do when it is the neighbors boyfriend.
Paul said that she wants to be my friend. I don't want to be her friend. I hate both Paul and Sandy for all of this shit. Paul did not have the decency to ask if her things can be stored in my house. He never asked if it was okay to move the modem.
I finally got the key to the deadbolt. He had the keys because he has things to fix. He finally put a new door knob on the door to the kitchen. He was going to help with the tree, it is still there. More branches are in the backyard killing the grass. I text a guy if he knew anyone that can help me with the tree. He does know someone. I just hope it doesn't cost me a bunch because I am running out of money.

Time for a little break

Just a few more days and my classes are doubling again. Just two more classes. I kind of took a break from my final project tonight. Last week of class is a struggle to participate for some odd reason.
Tomorrow morning, I think I will take Frank to get his nails done. Then, it is off to mom's house. I get more stuff done that way. Maybe it's because I can listen to the television in the background. I stay home and I have no television and all I want to do is watch Youtube.
This morning was an interesting event. I was up late as it is. Then, at approximately 2:30am, I felt like something smacked my body. This loud crack noise woke me up. I thought about getting up to see what happened. I didn't think anything of it and dozed off again.
I get out of bed at about 7:30 am and I let Frank outside. I was vaguelly remembering some strange occurance. I walk Frank out to make sure the fence is shut. There is another present my Dutch elm left me. The other half of the branch that fell not too long ago. Weird. Now, that I cannot afford to rent a chainsaw.
I don't know if anyone would be willing to help me get rid of the enormous branch in the backyard. Luckily, the other trees were around to keep it from causing serious damage. My concern was that it would make me a close neighbor without a fence. Either that or fall on my house or on the electric line.
I'm going to go to bed now. I have a tone to do tomorrow and for the next couple of days. Need to make the projects perfect.

I'm Responsible Why?

It has been quiet around the house. Nothing else is misplaced. The only thing that is misplaced are Paul's keys. He has been looking everywhere for them. Personally, I think the kids grabbed them and lost them somewhere. They were playing in his car a few days ago.
I pay for my bills for the house. Paul did take Sandy's stuff out of my house. I am not a storage unit. He has been doing yard work at her house and helping her clean out the drive way.
My garbage can that can be used was missing. I am pissed because I just paid $84 for the utilities and my garbage can was at Sandy's. Who the hell does that? Seriously. I am not chipping in for someone else's garbage. I have other garbage cans that he can use.
The key words are, "ASK ME." Never once did he ask me if it is okay to do something. He just up and does it. I sent him a text to give me my garbage can back and that I paid the bill. He has no right. He is over there, not over here.
I find it aggravating that I have to call dispatch just to get a point across to ask me first. I will be pissed off if I have to take him to court just to break up with him. It almost feels like he thinks we were married. There is a difference between marriage and dating. I can kick someone out without any strings attached, that is the difference.
So, anyway, he told me that he had the garbage can and would empty it out. Then he told me that he would give it back...as soon as he found his keys. Excuse the fuck out of me? He did this a couple of times before where he thought he needed something accomplished first when I needed something back, or rather a someone.
Instead of turning this into a legal matter, I sent him a message back. I asked him why I was responsible for him losing his keys and to put the garbage can back in my yard. I paid a bill that I cannot afford and he has not EVER paid for any of the bills.
So, the garbage can was back when I came home. Not to say that we are fighting. But this is the dumbest thing that happened. Supposedly, he is going to work on the yard. I have been coming home at night and the lawn isn't mowed and I have to water all the plant life. He said he is going to get my groceries. I hope so, there were a few things that I had to buy while playing the waiting game.
In other news, I picked my first garlic out of my garden. It smells really yummy. I think the rest will stay in the ground for now. The one I picked was kind of small.
And now, since I am addicted, I am prescribing a Danny a day to keep the mental doctor away.

Weirdos

So, I am alone in the house. I get this sick perverted call around noon.
A restricted number called my phone. "Do you know who this is?" I'm thinking it is someone I know, he sounded like the person in the last place I lived. It slipped, I said his name. Of course, he said it was him. (Do not give an answer, ask who it is and if they don't say: hang up the phone.) This individual proceeded to try to have phone sex with me. Then he asked for my mailing address. I told him no and that I just got out of a relationship and I didn't want to be giving my information away.
How this guy got my number...probably on Craigslist. Of all the inconsiderate pieces of shit. You have to be thinking these days when posting an ad. Not only do I have these dip shits that say they are a humanitarian or a bio chemist, now I can't even put my number on an ad. Thanks, asshole. People like this deserve to have a virus sent to their computer that will burn their house down.
So, new game plan. Fake e-mail address just for the responses. I am going under a different name. I also changed my number. I did not have to pay or extend the agreement. The only thing I had to do was program my phone and give friends and relatives the new number. I don't know if I got everyone, the multiple message thing is screwed up. If you need my new number, you know who to ring and I can answer with an e-mail.
The one thing that I would like to do is to set up a phony bank account. Something for the police to watch. You see, what these people are doing is sending a fake check that will bounce and cost the victim money. Lot's of money. How they do it.
Step 1. Respond to an ad and act really friendly.
Step 2. You respond back in a friendly fashion.
step 3. They send an e-mail back. The e-mail gives their life story of how they are in another country and how they would like to send money in advance. The grammar and spelling is horrific.
Step 4. (Which I do not get to.) Some sorry sucker falls for this and have them send a check to them.
Step 5. The check bounces and the perpetrator turns out to be a phony.
So, a fake bank account would be perfect. Banks should actually look into something like this. This way, they can protect their clients and help crack down on scams.
In other news, I cannot stop watching The Gradual Report. I am freaking addicted. he has about 400 sum odd videos. Hours and hours of blissful sexy Danny. Drooool. I hate when I get addicted to someone. It is so distracting. I am partially done with my class project. Pity I have to work overtime tomorrow. Not thrilled about it.
I didn't get any birthday cake. Paul made me a cake the next day. No, he's not moving back in. He needs to get his shit together before that happens. I am skeptical if that will ever happen. So far, he went a bought a new door knob for the kitchen door. Next, the hole in the wall.
I'm not going to have much time for the next couple of months starting after next week. My classes are doubling up again. I think I can pull it off though. I am taking Cultural Diversity and Environmental Science. I am already thinking that my final project for the environment is how nuclear testing has effected the environment. Cultural diversity...I already did a paper on African Americans and Native Americans. Maybe, I will go with Middle Eastern culture. It works, I wrote two papers about Egypt in high school, I love belly dancers, and Middle Eastern food. Oodles of resources...

Pity Party

He is moving out right now as we speak. I am really scared because I am going to be alone here. It's a pity because it has been about two years. Paul has been staying at Sandy's house across the street. Supposedly, he has been hiding his daughter there. I don't want any part of it.
I have been telling him to leave. He has been staying over there, he can go be a sponge over there and wreck her house. He said that Bree is using again, yep and he's a hypocrite for saying so.
I'm really confused at this point. Whenever I tell him to go, he says his stomach hurts or he needs to continue working on the lawn. What about me? What about my needs? He has never paid a dime living here. He has only paid me back for things. I still have yet to see him pay me back for the car. After the conversations, he acts like everything is all hunky dory. He stated he wanted to get along with me. Fix the shit you broke. Today was the final straw.
He left to run some errands for someone else. His daughter and her friend start running through the house and going through things. I told him to pack and go. And that is what he is doing.
Word of the wise, you break it you fix it. Don't stay at the neighbors house. Pay people back or you will lose your friends...or your fingers depending on the situation.

Ballpen Park Figure

Of course, I could very well be blowing smoke up your rear. I wonder what it would be like to have stock in pens, tweezers, and nail clippers. So many people loose those items. I know I have. I think I have spent at least $20 replacing tweezers and nail clippers alone. I am just one person.
According to some source in 2009, there were 306,861,871 people in the United States. Of those going to school or don't use a pen, I don't know. See if each person lost a pen and had to replace it each year and the pen was from The Dollar Tree, that would be about $306,861,871. If everyone lost a pack of pens a year, I normally pay about $4 for a pack of about 8, it would be about $1,227,447,484. That is something that is probably split up because there are more companies than Bic.
So, it's my birthday. My "boyfriend" is across the street again. I told him last night that I cannot do this anymore. His logic: 1. Nini is a nuisance. (He said this, not me) 2. Trying to hide daughter from Bree so she will sign off child support. 3. Sandy hurt her leg and he needs to be over there. No, no, no, just stop. Just pack your shit and go, I have another person in mind to be with...and he is employed.
Right now, I am hungry and should be working on my homework so I can play. I had to fight with Qwest again. These guys are seriously messed up in the head and expect to have business. I know how everything works and how much money is expected out of every representative. I worked for them for Christ sake.
1. I disconnected the phone service and only have the Internet. I was tired of people just picking up my phone and calling long distance without asking if I had long distance.
2. I have had to reset my password numerous times. Every time I go to pay my bill, I have to mess with the system.
3. Qwest took away their ability to serve their customers. A billing specialist cannot help someone who has Internet service only. A technical support agent cannot tell you if you have a balance. The automated phone system is closed at night so I cannot call until the morning. They refer me to chat. Chat cannot help me, I have to write a letter.
4. Qwest is losing a customer because they have their head up their ass.
5. I have an agreement. But, I have a game plan. Yes, Qwest, yes I do.
Why are companies making it hard to pay your bill? Qwest isn't the only one that gives me shit. Idaho Power is always messing around with their website to. Last time I had to pay the bill, I had to call them because the payment system has become MORE picky than it already was.
Set up an auto bill pay you say? No, I don't have enough money to have it withdrawn. I only have my insurance company doing this and I don't have enough money. I over drafted by $159 this month. I cannot set up an auto bill pay. Nobody is responding to the room for rent except for "humanitarians from south Africa." I don't have the funds. I have a job and I don't have enough money to live.
Paul owes me for the car, that was the last of my Chase account. I need that money to keep my head above water. He gets food stamps. He said he applied for a job. Which I do not believe because he lies to me.
Maybe I should look into investing in pens...

Danny is funny!

The Tiniest Violin In the World

Is playing the saddest song in the world for Paul. When he could have been hired by a manager, she was giving him pills instead of employment. Now, he is trying to find a way out of his addiction. He cannot afford a doctor.
He wants my support in this. Which I am fine with considering I have been supporting him in helping him find employment. I got another computer so he can be online and look for work. I bought him clothes so he can go to an interview. I even grabbed him another application, one that he lied about filling out. More support...
The major problem I have is that he is turning this into my problem. I start telling him something, he says that I am yelling at him. No, I am not. I tell him to stop doing something. He says that I am yelling at him. No, I'm not yelling until the third time the same thing happens again. He still does it. He starts reading things and going through things that are none of his business. He bothers me at a stressful job telling me that I am cheating and he is upset with me.
Things keep getting re-arranged by him. I have no clue where anything is anymore. He even changed items around in my totes. Now, I really don't know where anything is. He does things without me such as moving my room. There is no "together" with him. I keep telling him to stop. He does not.
He told me that it is my fault that he is taking medication. Paul told me that he does not know how to cope with me. I told him he needs to stop moving things around and leave me be to do my school work. It's not my fault. Just because I have to repeat myself like a broken record does not mean someone else needs to take drugs just to cope with me. Just because someone else instigates a fight with me does not mean they have to do drugs.
Telling me it is my fault that you are doing drugs will land you in the doghouse. Telling me it is my fault does not resolve the issue. It only makes me look like a scapegoat. Telling me something is my fault is the same thing as saying my parents divorce was my fault. It is the same thing as saying that I cause people to become an alcoholic.
I am sorry for such a crappy blog. I had to get it off my chest because I am pissed. I am tempted to call the head office of Taco Bell and ask them if it is customary to hire such scum bags and permit for bad work ethic to take place. I am upset with Paul and I believe that I will be mad at him for a long time.

Well, well, well

Have I told you people about this hobo that was living here? No, no, the girl. See, I'm going to have to really put my foot down. My home is turning into a ghetto in more ways than one.
Where to begin...Paul was abandoned here by his mom. She has stolen his cars a while back and sold them. She convinced him to leave Minnesota only to abandon him at a hotel in Idaho. She stole his money. That being said, he was sympathetic to this trashy girl.
He told me that her grandmother was talking trash about her while she was looking at the rooms. Her mom was in the hospital because of some heart condition. I am skeptical because of all the fun room mate crap. I am also a skeptic because Paul feels empathy because his mom treated him the same way.
She stays over a couple of days. I automatically feel uncomfortable and hate her guts. She said that her father and stepfather are locked up because they are threatening to kill her. She was forced into marriage and her hubby was in jail. She forgot to mention that she was on medication for mental problems. Need I say more?
Paul attempted to be sneaky about making her leave. I think he said we were going to be gone and she could not be here. He left her with a friend and bailed. I have not seen her for a while.
Yesterday, I hear someone tapping on the door. I thought the kid across the street was knocking on the door. I answered and there the girl stood. Apparently, I am not comfortable. She brought this weird looking skinny guy with her. She was asking for Paul. Then she started bombarding me with questions. Hey, I'm trying to work on school. More questions. I tell her to wait a minute, I call Paul and tell him she was there. I abandoned him with her. Later, he told me that she told her that she could not do that anymore.
Tonight, I hear knocking again. I am feeling leery because the neighbors boyfriend is threatening her and Paul. (Long story). I take a look out the window and there is a girl with a stroller standing outside. WTF. I open the door, there is hobo girl and her meth lab boyfriend.
I told her, "I don't mean to be rude, I have to work on my school. Paul isn't here and I do not know where he is." Leave me the hell alone. She left. I text Paul. He stated that she will make her stop. Maybe I will make her stop with a foot in her ass.
I spoke to Paul this morning. Of course, he said he was sick and I was yelling at him. No, I was not yelling. I told him I cannot tolerate his crap anymore. There was an application that he said that he filled out. I found it on the floor yesterday, blank.
Anyone remember that I said I bought a new door knob? He removed the door knob again, placed it on the bedroom door, and took the locking door knob to the neighbor across the street. Again, long story. He did not ask me, again. I thought he was going to use one of the numerous door knobs I have. Nope, he didn't ask.
I told him I do not like the chicken wire on my fence. I do not like the cheesy fence by the door that everyone can get caught on. I especially do not like the hole above my new door. He has not fixed it because he is too busy doing things that he should not. He even became addicted to medication. If I see the lady at Taco Bell that was distributing the pills, I'm going to kick her motherfucking ass. I'm going to have a ticket for assault and battery at Taco Bell to add onto my disturbing the peace ticket from another fast food restaurant. I am not afraid of the franchise big dogs, bring it on Taco Bell. I'm packing a lunch, literally.
I told him that he cannot be looking for a job that he wants. I realize he had child support. Who cares? He has been living in my home free. I let him use the other computer to look for a job. I help find him clothes to go to an interview. What does he do? Nothing. Just things that makes him look like white trash. I asked him what he is going to do if the government does not hire him. He said he will get that job. Well, he better. Or else.

What's New, Boo?

This here is my new toy. It is the tightest and tiniest digital camera I have ever owned. Paul said that he would help pay for it. How? I do not know. I still have to figure out how to retrieve footage from the old camera since it went bad. What happened with the old one, I will never know.
For a while, I didn't think the job was going to take notice of me. I was noticing e-mails about other associates moving up. As a matter of fact, there was a fiasco where I was given a no call no show. I normally have Wednesdays and Thursdays off. I had previously asked to switch one of these days. Nothing was happening and it seemed at the last second anyway. I went to see Justin on a Tuesday, I come back after my days off, and then I discovered everything was changed two and a half hours after I left.
Yesterday, it came to my attention how good I did last month. In the beginning, my score card was a little low. I have to get a three for about 6 months. In May, I got a three. June, I got a four! Looks like I am pulling through. The boss was talking to me about taking some steps before I start a new position. I am going to be shown the basic ropes before I am doing something new. Outstanding! I am so thrilled, I can't wait to learn more! She said I would be an excellent asset to the position because I am a writer. :)
So, I am going to be working even harder to keep up the good work. Just have to remember: stay patient and keep a smile on my face. I have exciting new things taking place and that really puts me in a good mood.

SHOES!!!

Yes, I knew mom would say hooker shoes. I couldn't resist. The shoes were on sale. They went from $79 to $29. It's that time of year.
I begin to log into Victoria's Secret. I start looking and I make a wish list. I think my wish list totals $1,500. There is not very much there. There are a black pair of shoes that I wouldn't mind getting for cheap.
Paul ran off to Twin Falls. I hope he gets his job back. He doesn't like it, but you cannot get what you want for work these days.
I am looking for someone that hires people that I can ask some questions tomorrow. I hope I can reach someone at Volt on a Saturday. Hopefully, boss lady will be there tomorrow so I can ask her some questions. :)